Open Letter to a Loved One – when misunderstandings happen

I’m writing this open letter as if to a sister, it could be a blood sister, an adopted sister, a spiritual sister, excetera. I think many of you can relate, as you also have someone in your life who comes to mind when you read this. Perhaps it is a friend, a spouse, a neighbor, a coworker. Perhaps you are a Mary and they are a Martha. Perhaps you want everything to be in a certain order, and their idea of order is different than yours….

Dear sister,

I’m very sorry that what I have done has disappointed you. I know you had high hopes that I would succeed at the things that you wanted me to do. I appreciate the high hopes that you had for me.

Unfortunately, I have had to walk each mile in my own shoes, and you have had to walk each mile in your own shoes, and nary the two shall meet. I cannot be you, and you cannot be me.

So, I believe we find ourselves at a place where we need to just accept one another, forgive and love one another, and leave our hopes and dreams for each other surrendered into the hands of God.

God did not create me to be you. And, he did not create you to be me.

I don’t believe there’s anywhere in the Bible where it says that we must understand each other. The command that Jesus gave us is that we love one another, not that we understand each other.

Over and over again the gospel writers told us to love one another, to tolerate one another, to accept one another, to forgive one another, to be kind to one another, to be patient with one another. In fact, the apostle Peter tells us to:

“keep fervent in your love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins.”

1 Peter 4:8

Sometimes it’s not even that we’ve sinned against each other. Sometimes we just do things a different way, and that should be okay.

I believe that we need to give each other the benefit of the doubt. I should not automatically think that you did something that I don’t like on purpose just to make me upset. And you should give me the same courtesy of giving me the benefit of the doubt.

Personally, I don’t go around doing mean things to people on purpose to make them upset. And yet, sometimes I still upset people.

So, sister, I ask that you please forgive me for the things that I have done that may have upset you. I will try to remember and do my best not to do those things when our paths cross in the future, but I cannot promise you that I will not fail from time to time. I am human, and therefore, I am not perfect.

So once again, we both find ourselves in need of obeying the great commandment of God, that we love one another, even as Christ has loved us. John 13:34

Thank you for taking the time to read this letter. I ask of you that you pray and seriously consider what steps you might need to take in order to walk in the way to which Christ has called us to walk with one another.

Sincerely yours,


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23 thoughts on “Open Letter to a Loved One – when misunderstandings happen

  1. Beautiful, and such an important reminder to love fully, exactly where we are. God is so good to create us different and unique, but sometimes that (paired with our humanity) makes things tricky. Always bring it back to love!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Wow!! Great post! This really speaks close to my heart as a fellow church friend and I had a misunderstanding…I prayed so much through it and felt so much peace over it because it was handled maturely but I’m also of the mindset that it’s ok to disagree however I don’t think she is so I’m sure this could be an issue at some point again.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Alicia! I’m so glad this was a blessing to you! And I’m glad you and your friend got things worked out. That says good things about you both.
      Yes, sometimes ideas we hold to are actually cultural and not Biblical at all. But whether they are or not, God still commands us to respond in love, which is patient, humble, and kind.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I love how relatable this is ❤ I hope this blesses others. I know it has blessed me. We need to understand God has made us unique. When we are divided, Christ can gather us together, and we meet in peace. He's been showing me that 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I absolutely love this! Such a beutiful way to convey an important point! I look forward to reading more of your writing! Blessings! I am glad T.R Noble lead me to your page through her Quotes From You Series. It is beautiful to see how God brings one another together.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Yes! God made us all unique. He gave us all different personalities and different gifts and different callings. He didn’t make us all the same. But, we are all necessary parts of the body of Christ. And, we do need to all be likeminded with Christ, and where we are likeminded with Christ we should be likeminded with one another. But, this doesn’t mean we are all going to agree about everything. But, loving other people doesn’t mean we agree on everything or that we condone everything others do. But, it does mean that we treat one another with kindness and respect, even if we differ with each other on the nonessentials of life.

    Liked by 1 person

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